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Hello,
I wanted to request prayer because I've been praying over a year now for God to help me develop a relationship with him in order to have a good life. However, during this time of prayer I would think God is leading me in this, and then later be unsure if he is leading, and become discouraged. I have burdens in my life that I find difficult to handle on my own and wanted God to give me a new life and guidance to deal with them, but I pray and it's like God is not giving clear confirmation that he is willing to work in my life. Now, I know from the Bible that if it is God's will, that he will give us salvation. Eight years ago I had an encounter with God in which I discerned I'm a sinner, and God's loved me despite my sinfulness. This drew me to him, but I believe I grieved the spirit away for not giving up a pet sin for those few years after knowing of God's love. After this, I had thought I had possibly committed the unpardonable sin because my heart became numb from sinning so just like now, I sought after God; but as I mentioned it looks like God doesn't answer me and that has left me in despair and misery. So I would like that you petition with me for God to let me know that I'm able to have a relationship with Him for a better life. I want to emphasise that I'm not at the place where I'm willing to give my life to God, recognise my need for God, or have a love of God. I would like to get to these places.
I thank you much,
Ryan L - Feb 17 2016
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